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The only real way to get rid of that emotional baggage from your last relationship is to speak to a good counselor or psychotherapist.
Remember all of this when you meet a mail order bride with kids.
They should be your primary concern, when it comes to choosing a person who might be sharing your life with you.
This is important for a number of reasons, not the least of which being the safety of your kids - you've all seen those horror stories online about what can happen when the “wrong people” are introduced to innocent children.
Now, the idea of being happy in yourself doesn't mean you need to have the perfect body, the perfect job, or a pile of cash in your bank account.
But what it does mean is that you need to be comfortable in your own skin, and to not be desperate to settle down with somebody, anybody, no matter what.
In most of these countries divorce is really frowned on and it was probably the last resort for a woman trying to escape an abusive situation.
You probably hate that idea - none of us want to drag up the things from our past that have hurt us, but if you want to have healthy relationships you need to deal with your past first. There are a lot of reasons, but they are double for single moms. Even if you find yourself struggling with the loneliness of being newly single, or how desperate you might feel to find new love, you still have your kids to think about.
It's the last thing you ever expect to happen, but once the process is set in motion there is very little you can do to stop it.
The main issue for newly single parents is that you have invested your entire life in your partner and your family, with little or no thought for yourself.
The very last thing you want is to add further instability to your children's lives by having a variety of boyfriends or girlfriends dropping in and out of their lives every few months.
This is completely unfair on them, and can cause a huge amount of hidden psychological and emotional damage, that will then affect their relationships in years to come.